A Nigerian lady has taken to social media to deliver strong advice to young women about choosing their life partners wisely, emphasizing that the true measure of a man’s character is revealed not in moments of calm but during times of anger and conflict. Her message has sparked discussions online about respect, self-worth, and the dynamics of healthy relationships.
She explained that a man who genuinely respects his partner will not resort to insults even when provoked. According to her, the way a partner communicates during disagreements or stressful situations is a critical indicator of maturity, emotional intelligence, and the value he places on the relationship. She stressed that patience and restraint are key markers of a responsible and loving partner.
Highlighting the dangers of excusing bad behavior under the guise of love or tolerance, the lady warned that tolerating verbal abuse, even in seemingly minor arguments, can lead to long-term emotional damage. She noted that repeated insults can slowly erode self-esteem, negatively affect the woman’s mental health, and strain relationships with extended family members. Her advice was clear: women must recognize red flags early and protect their self-respect.
Avoid men who insult you during simple arguments
The lady urged women to avoid partners who insult them easily, regardless of the circumstances or mood. She explained that some men use derogatory words habitually, even when not angry, revealing deeper issues such as insecurity, immaturity, or lack of respect. Staying in such relationships often results in long-term emotional harm and leaves women vulnerable to ongoing mistreatment.
She emphasized that women should “run afar” from men who normalize verbal abuse, reinforcing that it is not merely a matter of temporary anger but a consistent pattern of disrespect. She highlighted that excusing or tolerating such behavior often leads to regrets later in marriage and can undermine the foundation of trust and affection in the relationship.
Her passionate appeal underlined the importance of recognizing red flags early and prioritizing self-respect. She encouraged young women to set firm boundaries and ensure that their partners demonstrate respect, empathy, and emotional maturity consistently, not just when convenient.
Social media users reactions
The post drew strong reactions on X (formerly Twitter), with users sharing mixed opinions about her advice. Some agreed with the importance of respecting oneself and recognizing verbal abuse as a serious concern, while others argued that relationship advice should be reciprocal, with guidance for both men and women on maintaining healthy communication. Several users shared personal perspectives and counterpoints:
RealSirPee wrote: “You people’s advice is always about how a man treats a lady. Why don’t you people tell ladies how to behave? Some of them misbehave and blame it on zodiac sign, hormonal imbalance, mood swing, menstruation, etc.”
_SammyNas stated: “I won’t use bad words for you, but I’ll raise my voice, you can’t piss me off and expect me to be talking to you like a princess.”
edinen_ commented: “Men marry ladies who speak good words to you when angry.”
ox_villex observed: “Na the one way go beat craze comot their body dem dey always fine.”
The discussion highlights the growing awareness among Nigerians about emotional intelligence, healthy communication, and mutual respect as critical components of lasting relationships. The lady’s advice resonates with a broader audience concerned about protecting self-worth and promoting dignity within partnerships.
Watch the video below…
Girls please marry a man who speaks good words to you even when he’s angr¥ — Lady shares relationship advice to her fellow women! 👀 pic.twitter.com/fZxqnt4ItF
— TENIOLA (@Teeniiola) September 27, 2025
Overall, the message serves as a reminder to women to prioritize self-respect, recognize unhealthy patterns, and seek partners who demonstrate kindness, patience, and consistent respect, even in challenging situations. The advice also underscores the importance of setting standards early to cultivate strong and healthy relationships for the long term.
